The Vet (Part 1)

It started out as any other normal day: Noise thing goes off, person hits it, person gets her brown drink that she says makes her “function in the morning”, we eat breakfast, get ready, and head to the shop in the truck.

However, when we got to the shop on this particular day, we didn’t stay very long…

“Hey Shannon,” my person said “I have to take Sassy to the Vet this morning, it won’t be too long, I have to get her her rabies shot.”

“Oh poor thing,” Shannon said.

“Well, she’s pretty much an inside kitty, but I would hate for  her to get out by accident and get bit by something that was rabid. You never know what kind of critters are out at our place.”

Wait…. where are we going?

“So I shouldn’t be too long, and then I’ll head out with Anne to do the install,” my person said.

“Bye Sassy, I’ll see you back here after you get your rabies shot,” Shannon  said.

We went to the truck and started driving, and I was very confused…

Why on earth would I shoot a rabbit? I don’t even have a rabbit! Person, what is Shannon talking about? Does she need some of that brown drink you drink every morning?

“It’s ok Sass, we’re just going to get your rabies shot, and then you can turn in for the day, and rest at  the shop while I go to the install.

Wait just one darn tootin’ minute here Person…what do you mean I’m going tot turn into rabbit!!! Why on earth would I ever turn into a rabbit?!?!?! I like being a Kitty!!!

“It’s OK Sassy,…everything is going to be OK.”

There was nothing in the KGNTH about Kittys turning into rabbits!!!! 

“Breathe Sassy, it will all be over before you know it.”

BREATHE?!?! That’s easy for you to say! You’re not the Kitty that’s about to turn into a RABBIT!!!!!

 

 

 

 

 

What A Week….

I don’t even know where to begin…something so…so…so….I DON’T EVEN HAVE WORDS!!!! Something almost happened to me that I didn’t even know was POSSIBLE!!!!! It’s definitely no where in the KGTNH! I’m going to have to write them and…. I’m sorry, I’m getting off track.

You’re gonna have to come back next week so I can make sure I tell you this in a clear ….mostly calm fashion…what happened this week.

~Sassy

“Happy Valen-Flower-Gnome Day” (Part 2)

“Do we know what time Anne is getting here?” Iris asked.

“She texted saying that she should be in by 9:30. She has an install at 8:00 this morning,” my person said.

Jut then Shannon came in really excited about some box that came in.

“I got them!!!! They came in yesterday and she’s going to love them!” Shannon said.

BOX!!! 

I darted over to Shannon, and very politely reminded her that any box that comes into the shop MUST be inspected by me first.

“Hey Sassy, how are you doing? Wait ’til you see this, Anne’s going to think it’s great.”

That’s great, but I do really need to inspect that box please.”

“Here Sassy, I’ll open it up down here for you.”

Oh thank you Shannon. I knew you  understood.

Shannon opened the box, and like any good Stealth Kitty…I DOVE IN!!!!! Facing any danger head on is what we do.

“Sassy, what are you doing?” my person said.

I popped  my head out… Simply trying to protect all of you…back down I dove.

All clear! 

“Come here Sassers,” Iris said as she scratched my head.

I don’t normally like to be held, but I could see better with Iris holding me. I watched intently as Shannon pulled something out of the box.

“Oh my goodness!” my person said laughing. “Those Gnomes are hilarious!”

I looked at what my person, and now Shannon and Iris, were all laughing at.

WHAT!!!!!!! Why on earth are all those little people in that box!!!!!!

Shannon set them on the desk and the shelf and then went into the back room along with Iris and my person. I jumped up on the desk. They didn’t move.

Alright you….you Gnomes…..who are you and what do you want with Anne and this shop???

Nothing. They just sat there, the one with his mouth covered, one with his eyes covered, and the other with his ears covered.

That’s right, you better be scarred! So… you aren’t going to talk, or listen, or even look at me huh? 

Gnome

I then went over to the other little person…Gnome…whatever they are.

How about you?  Are you going to tell me what you want with our shop?!?!?!

Nothing

So, you’re just going to stand there and smile at me?

Gnome 2

Now here this you Gnomes. I’m not really sure what you are or why you won’t say anything, or why Anne is going to like you, or what in tarnation you have to do with this Valen-Flower-Gnome Day…but…. I WILL be watching you. 

“Happy Valen-Flower-Gnome Day” (Part 1)

I love my person. I love going to the shop. I love helping the people at the shop….

with paperwork…

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or sewing…

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….and I love protecting of all of them.

Yet, every once in a while…well, now that I think about it…alot of the time actually…my person and those she works with (never the small person…we understand each other) make absolutely NO SENSE!!!!!! Frankly…sometimes, they down right scare me!!!!!!

Take today for instance, it’s this “holiday” called Valen…something or other Day. I’m not really sure what that is, all I know, is my person says she’s allergic to something called roses…I think roses are a flower. So, OK, Valen-something Day is a weird day with flowers….right?….NOPE!  WRONG !!!

Now I hear her talking to Iris and Shannon (some of the people who work at the shop) about some Valen- Day Gnome for Anne, and something about a “inside joke.”

First off, what in tarnation is a Gnome?

Second, Don’t all “jokes” take place inside? Why would you want to do a joke, outside, this time of year in Wyoming…It’s FREEZING!!!

This is going to be a loooong day. You’ll have to bear with me ’til Anne gets here to see about this Inside Joke Valen-flower Day Gnome…whatever that is. Maybe I’ll talk to the small person, she might know something about this. She  has good information about alot of things.

Anywho…

Never fear, I will get to the bottom of this, and report back my findings next week.

Happy Valen-Flower-Gnome Day…

…I think.

Jerky (Part 2)

Welcome back fellow readers. I last left you at…

This is not a laughing matter…DON’T EAT THAT!!!!! It smells TERRIBLE!!!!!!….. That Buffalo Jerky is trying to kill you!!!!!

I went to swat the jerky from my persons hand.

“No Sass, this is my food, you have your chicken over there.”

 I’m not trying to eat it; I’m trying to SAVE YOUR LIFE!!!!

I realized that my person was not as advanced in the Kitty language as I though she was. I was really going to have to rethink how to get this stuff from her. She had already eaten a little bit. Who knows how much she would have to eat before she keeled over.

Think Sassy think!!!! I said to myself.

My person got up to do something. PERFECT!!!! I thought. My person had left the bag of Buffalo Jerky sitting on the table.  Remember…under ordinary circumstances I am FORBIDDEN from getting on the table, but this is a matter of life and death.

I did a quick scan of the room…listened for a moment…..OK, coast was clear. I leaped up on to the table.

There you are you ….you…person killing jerky!!!!!! You won’t hurt my person!

I cautiously crept closer to the bag. I sniffed the outside of the bag just to be sure of what I was getting into. The more I sniffed…the more confused I became. At first sniff, this buffalo jerky smells like it will kill you, but the closer you get to it…I don’t think it will.

I decided to get a small piece and take it to the floor before my person came back and I got in major trouble! I became even more curious about this buffalo jerky.

OK that’s it, I’m going to try it…..HOLY COW!!!!!!!!!!

“Sassy, what are you doing?”

PERSON!!!!!! This Buffalo Jerky is AMAZING!!!!! We need more of this!!!

 

Jerky (Part 1)

Many humans accuse animals of stealing their food. Now I can’t speak for dogs, or rabbits, or flamingos, or any other animals, but if a Kitty takes your food, it’s really for your protection. Yes, that’s right, we are trying to save your life.

I don’t know how many times I have saved my person’s life from strange food, but nothing compares to the first time I saved her life. She had come home from what she calls grocery shopping – apparently this is no fun to do, but she always gives me chicken after- so how bad can it be! Anywho… she was all excited about this thing she called Jerky…

What in the world is Jerky?

“Sassy, I know it’s weird, but I’ve always wanted to try Buffalo Jerky and the store finally had it on sale!”

Person, what in the world is Jerky?!

Every once in a while, my person get’s so excited about something, that she get’s lost in her own little world. She continued to put the food away while going on and on about this Buffalo Jerky.

“OK Sassy, here’s your chicken.”

Oh thank you!!!

Just about the time I went to eat my chicken, I heard this noise that sounded like something tearing. I looked over at my person, and she was sitting in her chair about to eat something.

Oh, she’s just opening a bag …

Then I got a whiff of something I had never smelled.

WHAT IS THAT?!?!?!

I leaped over to the chair and got between her and the bag.

Sassy, what are you doing?” she said laughing.

This is not a laughing matter…DON’T EAT THAT!!!!! It smells TERRIBLE!!!!!!….. That Buffalo Jerky is trying to kill you!!!!!

Piano Kitty

A while back I told you how my person teaches piano lessons. Sometimes we go to other houses to do the lessons, and sometimes the little kittys…I mean people….come to our house and play on our piano.

After listening to my person teach the kittys….people….I decided that I needed to learn to play the piano too.

I waited til my person was done teaching the lesson then I went and talked to her about my decision…

“Hey Sassers, how are you doing?”

I am doing just grand, thank you for asking.

I jumped up on the seat and got right next to her. My person likes it when you just tell her what you would like, or need to do. She always says, ” Just out with it already, don’t beat around the bush.” I’m not really sure what “beating around the bush” means, but anywho…..

“What’s up Sass?”

I was thinking it might be nice, if I could learn how to play the piano.

“You like the piano don’t you Sass.”

I do…so about those lessons…

“You want to play the piano Sass?”

YES!!!!

“Come here, let me see your paws…”

I hopped over to my persons lap, and she put my paws on the piano.

This…is…so…FUUUUUUNNNN!!!!!

“Is that fun Sass?”

Oh my goodness, I should have done this forever ago!!!! Now I know I need to practice…

“I’ve got another lesson in just a few minutes, but you can play until they come.”

Person, you are so great!

I mean, how many of you have a person who lets you practice the piano…it really doesn’t get much better than this…unless their’s chicken…but this is a very close second.